I’ve been redeveloping my sweet tooth these past few months. Previously, I had been at a point where I was eating a ‘real’ dessert (like big gooey baked thing) once a week and otherwise sticking to small amounts of lightish sweets the rest of the time (think a few squares of dark chocolate each day.)

Then I started drinking diet soda at least once a day and adding a bit more candy. And hey, like I’ve said before, it’s one of the great things about having a better understanding of how this whole weight-loss thing works that my diet can fluctuate without completely stopping the progress I’ve made. But now I’m at a point where I’m craving (and eating) something sweet at the end of each meal. I’m drinking hot chocolate (peppermint hot chocolate tastes like christmas!) and my sugar consumption is pretty high and sugar substitute consumption is probably even higher.

So I’m wanting to get back to a more balanced diet. There’s pretty much no reason for me to worry about my waist circumference if I’m doing the same kind of damage with my diet.

Easy to say. Hard to do. I make a nice lunch. Sandwich on sprouted wheat bread. Peas with ‘butter’ and curry powder. And a nice ripe banana. No sooner is the last bite finished then I’m thinking of the cookies in my cabinet. So good. And I want one. I have one. I feel frustrated and wonder if I should go back to never having any kind of sweet in the house (no.) Repeat for about a week. Each time reinforces the belief that I’m going to go get that cookie every time. I feel a bit helpless.

Until it occurs to me yesterday that this belief (I cannot control my intake of sweets) exists solely as a thought inside my brain. It is only more powerful than the thought “I am totally capable of eating fewer sweets” because I keep favoring it over the latter. But all of this drama is just inside my brain and really, I do actually have the power to stop this pattern. And then, like that. It stops. I get green tea instead of hot chocolate while I’m studying for finals at the coffeeshop. I don’t eat a dessert after lunch. After dinner, I make a pot of fruity tea and eat one shortbread cookie while reading a book. I am satisfied. Gone is the struggle, the constant cycle of wanting-obsessing-indulging-recriminations.

The interesting part is that if you had taken me through the same idea last week, I would have agreed, but it wouldn’t have clicked. I have no clue what causes the final click, but it really does feel like a switch gets flipped. It’s that abrupt sometimes.

Interesting snippet on the NY Times website today on whether or not exercise helps you sleep.

But physical activity during the day and sleep onset at night were closely linked: every hour of sedentary activity during the day resulted in an additional three minutes in the time it took to fall asleep at night. And the children who fell asleep faster ultimately slept longer, getting an extra hour of sleep for every 10-minute reduction in the time it took them to drift off.

Now the article is mainly talking about a study involving children, but it does link to a couple of papers which suggest a similar effect in adults.

Now I know that my sample of one is fairly meaningless, but I definitely noticed a big change in how long it took me to fall asleep at night when I became more physically active. I suffered from fairly regular bouts of insomnia from the time I was a teenager well into my mid twenties. Now I still sometimes act like some kind of giant toddler when I’m tired; refusing to go to sleep, holding out until I’m so tired that flossing and brushing my teeth takes a huge amount of effort – but once I hit the pillow, I’m generally out in less than fifteen minutes.

I’m interested now though in whether or not there’s any truth to the idea that you shouldn’t exercise past a certain time at night because it will prevent you from falling asleep.

One of the things I’m taking advantage of in school this time around is the awesome array of PE classes. I plan on learning to ice skate (I wanted to this semester, but it clashed with a class I needed) maybe some ballroom dancing. I might even take a badminton class. Next semester though I’m taking indoor soccer. Soccer is hands down my favorite sport. It’s one of the only ones I like to watch on TV and it was the only one I played for more than a single season as a kid. I wasn’t any good, but who cares. So I’m really excited to get the chance to run around kicking a ball a few hours each week.

However, I’m kind of worried about one small issue: my belly. Mainly, it’s excessive (and not always *silent*) jiggle when I run hard. I want some kind of shorts that give a bit of control in that area, but are also made for exercise and it would be great if they didn’t ride up while I was running around.

Any ideas?

I’ve already mentioned my rather shameful enjoyment of The Biggest Loser. Even after reading, again, about how some contestants sacrifice their health in order to win the show, I am probably still going to watch it next Tuesday.

Now, that may be a bit of an extreme example, but this is hardly the first time I’ve liked something against my better judgement. It’s a weird thing to both enjoy something and to mock/judge your own enjoyment of it. But I’ve done it for years at least where music is concerned. I tend to adore top 40 pop crap. Driving beats and asinine lyrics totally do it for me despite having often surrounded myself with knowledgeable music snobs who are always eager to introduce me to some musicians with actual talent.

Then there are those things which clash with my politics/beliefs. The Biggest Loser, obviously. I am a HUGE fan of Family Guy despite the liberal DUDE-ism which permeates most of the show. And I like the Twilight series (seriously, the lesbian feminist loves the sparkle vamps) despite the numerous ‘icks’ I get from the books and the fact that I pretty much hate giving money to someone who’s going to give a big chunk of it to the mormon church (due to their anti-homo proclivities.)

And it’s not that I’ve given up analyzing the reasons why I like these things or why they’re problematic. Quite the opposite. Nor am I unwilling to change my mind. I guess I just decided at some point that there was nothing to be gained by pretending. By going along with what I thought I should say rather than being honest about what I thought. I mean, I’d still own hours of over-produced pop and a well-thumbed copy of “Eclipse”, I would just have to hide them when I had company. This way, at least I can have the conversations and maybe learn some things. Mostly though I’ve just found that a lot of people like crappy stuff and they are eager to connect with others who do too.

So what do you like that sucks?

I felt like this post was probably needed (at least I needed it) again. I have enjoyed all the food this holiday, but boy am I ready for a good week or so of temple foods.

Despite the fact that she is not in the least bit vegan-friendly, I have a great love for Nigella Lawson. I watched her show when you could only see it on the Style network just because I loved how apparent her enjoyment of food was. From the selection of ingredients, to the prep (and tastings) and the final presentation, enjoyment and taste is paramount.

Also, she is OMFG! sexy.

*Fans self*

Ok, where was I?

One of the fantastic things about Nigella Lawson is how food positive she is. Food is there to be enjoyed and full fat everything is the order of the day.

So it’s no surprise that I thought of her today when I was wondering how to talk about that sort of “oh no, no more pie/nog/champagne/cookies/cakes/candy/cupcakes/gravy/sweet potatoes/mashed potatoes ever AGAIN” feeling and how to deal with it without reverting to the framing of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ food. After all, there’s nothing wrong with enjoying yourself and, even if you feel a bit like a well-fed tick after the holidays, it certainly doesn’t mean you need to punish yourself. But, if you’re like me, right about now your body is ready for something different.

That’s when I remembered “Temple Food.” Nigella’s word for the kind of thing you want after a night (or several weeks) of rich food and drink. We’re not talking calories or fat or paying some sort of penance for daring to feast with our loved ones, but clean fresh flavors and ingredients that restore and nourish your body and wake up your taste buds.

One of the foods she puts in this category is hot and sour soup. It absolutely epitomizes everything that I’m craving after mounds of family-style comfort food. Tangy, spicy, a little bit sour and full of fresh ingredients, it’s also perfect when I’m suffering from my annual post-xmas head cold (which would be now.) Her version uses broth made from chickens, but veggie broth or no-chickn broth (if you can get it) work just as well.

My version of Nigella’s hot and sour soup:

1 quart no-chikn stock

2 tablespoon tom yam paste

Handful chopped bok choy (or spinach)

1 stick lemon grass, tender inner part only, roughly chopped

juice of 1 lime

3 small fresh red or green chillies, finely chopped

1 tsp sugar

1 cup sliced button mushrooms

1/2 package extra firm silken tofu, cut into slices

5 green onions, cut into short lengths and then into strips

pinch of dulse flakes (optional)

1.Heat the stock and tom yam paste in a decent sized saucepan with the lemon grass, lime-juice, chillies, dulse and sugar.

2.Bring to a boil, add the mushrooms and tofu and simmer for a couple of minutes, then add the green onions and bok choy and cook for a further 2-3 minutes.

And for those necessary (and delicious) fatty acids, my other favorite temple food is stuffed avocado. Generally I make a nutmeat from walnuts, pine nuts, basil, sundried tomatoes, balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Then I scoop a big heap of it into half an avocado and dig in.

The concept of temple foods is so appealing to me that I think I’ll expand it to a lot of areas. I need temple-like surroundings after the chaos of the holidays so I’m taking lots of quiet time for myself. Being sick and it being cold as fuck outside, I don’t feel like stressing my body with running so I’m taking soothing scented baths and doing gentle yoga. After all the stress, joy, cooking, shopping, fighting, and laughing of the holiday season, my whole being needs some simplicity and a whole lotta ommmmmmmm.

If you have any great temple foods or practices that help you this time of year, share them in the comments.

It’s probably my pagan roots, but I’m a big fan of feasting holidays. A big table weighed down with dozens of dishes – oh, it fills me with delight. I’m definitely not worrying about calories or macronutrient ratios today.

So I’m thankful for a lot of things. For family and friends and the opportunities life has given me. I’m also profoundly thankful that I wake up each morning feeling like I’m moving closer to becoming the person I always wanted to be (and no, the number on the scale is not the deciding factor in this.)

Have a good day, everyone.

So a few posts ago I said I would share some of my thoughts on Dr Sharma’s etiological assessment of obesity. You can check out his handy-dandy chart below:

This comes from the thought (outlined in the first link in the post) that the accumulation of excess fat is not in and of itself a disorder, but rather a sign that something is happening to upset the body’s energy balance. At first I was thinking that this distinction was kind of semantic, but the more I thought about it, I realized that an idea like this could have a profound effect on how doctor’s approach the treatment of obesity. If you’re not trying to treat being fat, but looking for factors that might be leading to changes in body fat, the constant haranguing to just ‘lose weight’ would have to cease. If you have a patient with persistent pain, you wouldn’t tell them to ’stop being in pain’ all the time, after all. (ok, I’m not the queen of analogy today, whatever.)

Ok so here is where I get hung up. Now, I don’t have a problem with acknowledging that gaining (or losing) weight has to involve some kind of energy imbalance, but what if you have a fat patient who is weight-stable? And what if this fat patient is also healthy with no conditions that are correlated to carrying a lot of body fat? Is it necessary to start analyzing the reasons for someone having an ‘unhealthy’ bmi if they’re not unhealthy and/or continuing to gain weight? I guess, what this comes down to is that I’m not sure how I feel about automatically classifying high weight as a symptom. Now considering some of Dr Sharma’s other ideas, I would assume this wouldn’t be an issue, but I’m not sure.

Obviously, I’m posting without having fully refined my thoughts so more on this may be forthcoming.

The NY Times has an article on the unsafe practices some Biggest Loser contestants use to win the show.

Dehydration, starvation etc.. etc… It’s not a surprise to me, but I can’t help but wonder if there are people using TBL as a template for their own weight loss and feeling like miserable failures when the reality is they’re healthier than the most successful contestants.

I know I know. I said I would discuss the articles from my previous entry. I’m still thinking some of this stuff over though so it’ll have to wait.

Anyway, I thought I would ask some of you a question. I know that I have quite a few readers who have lost weight by overhauling their lifestyles. What I’m struggling with now and hoping to get some feedback on is this: Did any of you have reconciling aspects of your old lifestyle with how you like to live now? Like, I feel bored and restless doing a lot of the things that I used to enjoy doing with friends. And I often get a lot of crap from family and some friends for not eating the way I used to (“But we always get dessert!”) or for wanting to go to they gym most days. I’m intensely happy with the changes I’ve made, but I feel like I can barely mention them IRL for the reaction I’ll get.

Did any of you struggle with these issues? Did they get resolved?

A couple of interesting articles from Dr. Sharma’s website. I’m very tired and don’t have the energy to discuss them at the moment. So tell me what you think. I’ll discuss them in more detail tomorrow.

Obesity is a sign, overeating is a symptom
In fact, the more I think about it, the more I am convinced that we should look at obesity as a clinical sign – not unlike edema.

In the same manner that edema reflects the excess accumulation of fluid, obesity reflects the excess accumulation of body fat. As edema is a clinical sign of a perturbation of fluid homeostasis, excess fat accumulation is indicative of a perturbation in energy balance.

Etiological assessment of obesity
…the assessment of obesity requires a systematic assessment of factors potentially affecting energy intake, metabolism and expenditure.